To be understood

Friendship is one of the important aspects in our life. A good friend can always help you to learn in a better way. Even children observe their friends and learn many things. However the kids with autism can't make friendship easily as they have communication and Socialisation impairment. We need to help them to initiate friendship.
The children with autism love to play alone with a car or any toy which they like. We call it solitary play. Children are building a tower or completing jigsaw puzzle usually at around 2.5 or 3 years.In case of children with autism we may have to help them to explore repeatedly . This is called "constructive play". Children start playing alongside with other children and might use similar toys. Just in the pictures

Abhi and Pratyayan are playing .
Gradually children with ASD may learn to share ,to take and give through play of course with instruction and we call it "associative play". Another important form of play is Cooperative play through which children learn to play cooperatively ,following rules and thus they learn to work together. All these steps are not easy and we need to help them to initiate play .
The question is how many mainsream kids are coming to play with them?How can they develop a sense of togetherness?

Accept Involve Motivate

Bully and Humiliation is not new to us . However it is a common issue nowadays even in the reputed schools may it be integrated or special. We never teach our children how the other one feels being humiliated this way and what can be the consequences in the future for that humiliated child.
Srijon has faced such difficulty in his class and so is Swopnil. Swopnil is in class viii and he doesn't want to go to school anymore. Parents are taking him for counselling .
Srijon has" learning disability" and his classmates regularly humiliates as he can't remember and score good marks . Many times he can't write answers in the answer script. But he looks for friendship and loves to play. He loves to share his colours in the drawing class with his friends.
My organisation "Anubhuti" has taken an initiative to motivate them. We are involving teenagers of mainstream schools to take their classes under our guidance. May be a story telling class!
Somsubhro goes to South Point School and reads in class ix. Somsubhro takes Srijon's storytelling class. Srijon is happy to be accepted and Somsubhro is happy in this new venture.

Life with dignity as an adult even without parents

World autism Day!! Celebrations awareness questions of Rights and abilities. But the question is how many individuals with autism live with dignity as an adult? Do they get an opportunity to be employed ? What is the future of the kids with autism when parents will not be there to support the kids? Countries like India must act now .

Where Spring doesn't bring new light

 "I find it impossible to ignore the bantering of teenagers with love.One week Susie loves Johnny, the next week Susie loves Johnny , then she loves Tommy. Then she hated both Johnny and Tommy and loves Billy. Girls chatting about their hopes of a romantic candle lit dinner and boys promising to return home from college to be reunited with their true love's in high school.Each adolescent is certain that his/her love is true and will result in a life long commitment." Cheryl L Dickson
I was going through the Psychological analysis of teenagers by Dickson. I thought to share about a different world , different from the world of Susie Tommy Johnny Billy. It is the world of 'abir'. Abir has autism, moderate level, delayed speech in childhood and even now the speech is not clear though he wants to speak a lot. He is 18 years of age. You can't understand by his good eye contact, facial expression and smile that he is different than Tommy Johnny Billy. You can be impressed at his smile at any time.
I knew Abir since my training days of 'special education'. After couple of years I met him in a workshop of " autism and employment scope" . He is grown up now. He had been one of our case studies of vocational assessment. Abir came and sit with us. He smiled at me and others of my group too. So I didn't understand that if he remembers me. Abir is 18. A clean dressed , handsome guy with attractive social smile.He must have  also gone through hormonal changes, body developments which strongly implicate in the intense feeling of sexual attraction , falling in love at this age. But in Abir' s case we can't talk about 'falling in love'.Due to communication and Socialisation impairment Abir and others who have autism may not initiate a relationship the way normally teenagers of their age do. Sexual and romantic experiences and feelings might have extra challenges for the teenagers with autism.Many teenagers with ASD can find it hard to understand feelings of intimacy ,attraction and affection in themselves and others. It might also be harder to express their feelings.If the teenagers with autism find these feelings difficult he might be more at risk of doing inappropriate things.
Abir tried to answer all our questions though his speech is not clear.
Educator :Do you eat independently?
abir : Maa
Who picks up the phone at home?
Maa
I could understand he only sees his Mom as she fulfils all his need. His Mom fulfills all Abir's need in such a way that she herself never thinks that Abir is dependent in all his daily living activity even at this age
To me now the question is what next? A boy who has reached 18 lives in a world where he only sees his Mom fulfills all his need which again has made him dependent all the time.
I am really worried being a rehabilitation guide. What will Abir do in the future? Sit at home and watching Television and spreads his sweet romantic smile to people around and neighbours and may be the members of the family will make fun of him?Is this the future he deserves?
Mom's, this is hightime to know and understand your child's future and plan accordingly.
Spring may not bring a new light to Abir, Abir may or may not meet a Susie or Rina or Meena however each boy and girl in this different world has right to live a life with dignity which can be prepared from his childhood.
" I am determined to show my critics my true personality
Hoping that people move away from their narrow minded mentalities
I want them to know that I am a bright young man
Who is willing to take on as many challenges in life as I can
I want to make new friends and create a new start
I like to develop a new relationship with open heart
I hope to be accepted for the person that I am
So people can understand a true autistic man".
Scott Lentine
High Functioning Autism adult
26 years